Makery

Special girls: stand and pee with dignity

When will we see unisex urinals? © Makery

Festivals are filling up, and so are urinals. Ladies, this one is for you. In order to avoid peeing on your shoes or mooning the public gaze, Makery gives you this DiY to freely urinate standing up.

To sit or not to sit? As we enter the season of festivals and other open air events, this existential question comes back to haunt the female mind: How to pee when public toilets are nonexistent or become impractical?

Sensitive to this dilemma, the organizers of Bout du Monde festival in Crozon (July 31 to August 2) have taken the initiative to offer festival-goers disposable cardboard stand-to-pee devices (STP) made by a start-up from Nantes. These practical single-use or reusable objects, also called portable urination devices, allow women to urinate without squatting.

All these considerations inspired our editorial team. For a stress-free summer, Makery found a few tricks to urinate in peace under any circumstance and make your own low-cost STP. But first, a journey to the land of pocket chamber pots and their 21st century counterparts.

Most chic: the Bourdaloue

Historically, the restrictive squatting urinating position has stretched female creativity to all sorts of extremes, from hazardous devices to biped strategies. A good example of one pioneering genre is the portable chamber pot, or bourdaloue, used by high-class ladies from the 17th century onward.

“Intimate Toilette (woman peeing)” François Boucher, circa 1760. The bourdaloue, ancestor of the STP. © Wikimedia Commons

According to legend, “well-prepared ladies” stuck listening to preacher Louis Bourdaloue’s endless sermons “hid in their sleeve” these oblong pocket ceramics in order to relieve themselves discreetly. Ok, not very convenient to carry around a festival. Not only that, they can be easily confused with a sauce boat.

All about the Bourdaloue at Jane Austen’s World

Most precursor: the Sanitary Protector

Pioneer of the genre, Edyth Lacy, a “subject of His Majesty the King of Great Britain” living in New York, patented in 1922 the first disposable female urination device (FUD) made of paper. The patent was actually very open source, as Edyth Lacy already allowed for modifications and improvements to it, provided that they not betray the “spirit of her invention”. These very simple plans are just as relevant today.

Sanitary Protector patented by Edyth Lacy. © Google patents.

Complete patent

Most DIY: duct tape PSU

The DIY winner goes to this PSU (Pee Standing Up) device on Instructables. Duct tape, tubing, scissors and transparency film is all you need for this reusable device—after rinsing, of course.

Duct tape PSU. © Instructables

All fabrication steps on Instructables

Most on the road: STP in the bushes

On the Women on the Road website, one adventurer offers a solution to make a quick-and-ready STP out of a medicine spoon. Simply drill a hole at the end of the handle to convert into a convenient and reusable FUD. She recommends that you practice in the shower first, however.

More tips on Women on the Road website

Most resourceful: paper coffee cup recycled into an emergency FUD

Another delicate situation: What to do when you’re stuck in a traffic jam with a bladder that’s ready to burst? One YouTuber suggests pissing in your coffee cup, which she so regrets dissing one hour earlier.

Demonstration of coffee cup FUD:

Most high tech: 3D-printed STD

On Thingiverse, two male (!) designers have uploaded files (here and here) to 3D-print FUDs.

FUD elegantly named The Chick Dick. © Thingiverse.

Most lazy: commercial FUD

Paper, cardboard, plastic or silicone, manufacturers are diving right in. FUDs have been big business since the mid-1990s, especially in the U.S. There are a multitude of varieties sold in shops, pharmacies and online. Cost is about 3 euros for a pack of 3 disposable FUDs and between 12 and 20 euros for a silicone reusable FUD.

Very instructive comparison of commercial FUDs:

Our suggestions:

For pratical usage, follow Whoopi Goldberg’s advice in this video excerpt of The View or this demo by Poussey, one of the heroines of “Orange Is The New Black”:

For more options, see Wikihow on how to pee standing… with or without a device.

In case of emergency, see the (very) practical guide “How to Shit in the Woods” (3rd edition, 2014)